Rocking Toward More Than Just Music

Today was quite the emotional struggle. Although, for Isabela, it must have been one of the most highly anticipated afternoons of all of her little life. It started when she walked into our bathroom and quickly noticed the new shirt with tags on it. It was a dark brown, Hannah Montana shirt along with a bright glittery pink belt attached to it. Crystal had left it on top of her little closed toilet for her. Isabela's face lit up and couldn't stop chanting "I am going to go to Hannah Montana's party today!"

I have known about my friend's daughter's 5 yr. old birthday party for a couple of weeks now. Safely, I assumed that the young guests would be dressing the part, too. So, when Crystal and I were in Target during my "3 hour alone time" yesterday morning, we looked around at the shirts to find "the one" for Isabela. However, I couldn't do it. I could not bring myself to purchasing one. Two reasons....1) I have never really cared for Isabela (or anyone) sporting/advertising a tv/movie character on an article of clothing (what for?) 2) I knew what it meant when she finally would be waring one....that she was old enough to care for and make choices based on her desires. In other words, that she isn't a little baby anymore. So, what did I do? I walked out of the store...with no shirt in hand.

As Crystal was driving me to my car, I read my emails sent to my phone. Of course, at that very moment, my friend Rebecca sent a reminder notice about the party and along was a note of encouragement for Hannah Montana attire on the guests. "ShooT!!" How could I let my little girl go and feel left out just because Mami had issues with it? So, I quickly turned to Crystal and asked her to do my dirty work and off she went to the Target down the road and I went home to temporarily forget about it. ...until today.

Isabela had no idea who Hannah Montana was until today when I gave her the 101 and let her watch a music video on my iphone as we were driving home from Memorial Park. She actually seemed amused. But, not as amused as to what Crystal and Mary did to her when dressing her up for the part! Wow...I failed as a mom today, I couldn't do it. Crystal had fun with it and so did Isabela...hair, nails, shoes, glitter make-up, etc. Off we went to the party.. ..

As Isabela and I set off for our 26.6 mile trip, I realized then that she had never really been as excited about an activity as she was for this party. It felt like it did on prom day for Crystal. I was so very happy for her. The two road closure detours and the stranded mattress on the freeway that almost made me flip over, really frustrated me today. I hated that any hurdles would get in the way of my baby's excitement...she was so very excited...so very happy.

In the end, at the party, as the 5, 7 and 8 year olds reenacted music videos by singing and playing instruments on their plastic equipment, Isabela only wanted to "hang" with the big girls. She wanted to blend in with the crowd. There were other kids her age (2-4 yrs. ) outside jumping in the moonwalk and swimming, but Isabela was not interested. I learned today, that she is growing up, she really isn't my little toddler anymore :-(

(I am sure my friend Rebecca is feeling the same thing tonight as her little baby turns 5...but I still wanted to kill her for doing this to me today! :-))

Thank you, Crystal... YOU ROCK!